Guess which one I want!

The Friday Reality Check!

Clashin' fashion before dashin'

Arian Soheili, who leads the 2014 Sun Run InTraining group at Walnut Grove
in Langley makes everyone feel comfortable. This awesome moment, which I captured with my trusty iPhone, became an instant hit on social media with running clubs across the province.

St. Paddy's Day Run in Vancouver

Had a chance to meet some new peeps at the finish line. They not
only ran in these fun costumes, they kicked my butt!

Check out my blog and more photos of the fun event:

http://blogs.vancouversun.com/2014/03/17/irish-eyes-were-miling-around-stanley-park-as-lassie-rejects-elite-blogger-after-turtle-like-time/

Miles of Smiles in Walnut Grove

This free picture slideshow customized with Smilebox

Lunching with merry munchkins after following the not-so-mellow quick road

The Walnut Grove Sun Run training team, known as Arian Nation, lines up for a 5K run on Sunday.

Anyone who strolled into Walnut Grove Community Centre on Sunday could be forgiven for mistaking the morning assembly in Meeting Room No. 2 as a casting call for the Wizard of Oz.

There was a lot of discussion about heart, courage and brains from this North Langley gathering consisting of many cute munchkins, sleepyheads, a Winkie guard (hello Bob), a lame lion (hello Brian) and at least one hot air balloon (hello Arian).

We won’t get into wicked witches or jitterbugs as this scribe still has to spend six more weeks with this eclectic Sun Run training group — providing I can catch these flying monkeys from now until April 27’s big event in downtown Vancouver.

It was 5K day Sunday and for the first time since this fun learn to run exercise began, I fought the road and the road won.

The biggest mistake, leader Arian Soheili pointed out after, was I and several other excited newbies started too fast, didn’t establish a proper pace and died midway through the run. That’s putting it nicely.

If truth be told, I was really bummed out for a few hours after. A good week of training, improved eating habits and increased exercise didn’t translate into a strong run. In other words, I performed like a Canuck power play.

We were given two 5K choices: One group that went six minutes then walked a minute, or the other which went 10 minutes, then walked a minute.

I picked the latter and that proved to be a tad too ambitious. Wasn’t quite ready for that group, albeit for the first 1½ reps I was OK, but at about the 17-minute mark I ran out of gas. The rest of the route was a bit frustrating.

Good food, good fun, good
people mingle after Sunday's 5K

I joked after that because there was a potluck lunch at the finish-line I wanted to get first crack at the good stuff, but in reality a combination of poor pacing and strategic stupidity did me in. (Or, maybe I’m just a better runner before the Daylight Saving Time change!)

The other notable thing was the “undulating” course — the Merry-Go-Mountains, in Oz speak.

The natural thing for new runners or those getting back in the game like me (rusty Tin Man) after a decade of couch surfing, is seeking flat terrain to start.

That’s good until you run a few hills like we did Sunday and you realize that you need to include them in your weekday training or you will struggle every time there is an incline as it impacts breathing, pace and energy output.

So, I will add a hill or two this week, slow the pace down a tad and try to go longer and run smarter. Ironically, the Runner’s World calendar for Sunday said the new runner rule of thumb was to focus on going farther before going faster.

Soheili told our group over lunch that you can teach running, but you can’t teach courage and he said we all have to find that inner strength to win our own battles while running.

“We have to shed the fears, the doubts that are in us. I’ve done a half-marathon and half way you ask yourself ‘what the heck are you doing here? I don’t want to be here, somebody come and get me.’ Really, literally, I’ve felt that.

“… But I’ve had to have the courage in me to say ‘no, you’re here, it doesn’t matter what time you finish, but you’ve got to finish.’

“You’ve trained and you’ve had a setback, but you don’t quit. Don’t allow yourself to quit. Ever.”

While we give Arian a tough time for his loud and mischievous ways, he always seems to be the voice of reason when it really matters.

And on Sunday, when some of us were thinking of new hobbies and selling our running gear, he challenged us to remember the positive, keep training, run a bit slower and smarter and to go kick some asphalt.

While often he’s more blizzard than wizard, on this day the motivational message from the leader of Arian Nation was pure money. Even if his mouth was half full!

Yep, we’re not in Kansas anymore …

ON THE PADDY WAGON: Do you know what Bryan Adams, Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Larry King, George Canyon and Bobby Clarke have in common?

They are all diabetics who have found ways to excel despite dealing with this metabolic disease.

This Saturday, the 10th BMO St. Patrick’s Day 5K is being held at Stanley Park. The run has raised more than $80,000 for the Canadian Diabetes Association and will boost that impressive total this weekend.

Kudos to the organizers and participants for this worthy event and for demonstrating, once again, how the running community is paying it forward for a plethora of worthy charities in this province.

The winner last year, Geoff Martinsonof Victoria, completed the course in a lightning-fast 14:38, while the top female was Sabrina Wilkie of Vancouver in 17:07.

Twitter.com/ohgord 

Whipping through the park in first leg of 5K.
Dude in the back (that's me) enjoys the view and drafting (wink, wink!)

Carbo-loaded and getting ready to kick some asphalt

The Hunger Games haven't been played much at my house since running in Abbotsford's Run For Water several years ago. Hope to get back to denting pavement in the next few days and lace up for The Sun Run on April 27.

Thick and tired of being mistaken for The Michelin Man’s hairier, heavier brother, my ambitious New Year’s resolution for 2014 is purposely geared to spend much less time around those irresistible, but oh-so evil gals Laura Secord, Wendy, Sara Lee, Poutine Patty and Aunt Jemima.

If all goes according to plan, Greenpeace will never again roll me back in the water while I tan on a beach and, hopefully, we won’t need satellite for those cheesy before-and-after training photos.


As red-nosed relatives chowed down Christmas Day turkey, and loose lips divulged information that “The Big Guy” was recruited to be part of the Guinea Pig Program for the 30th edition of The Vancouver Sun Run, one woofled wise man blurted: “Gordo, you can sort of be an inspiration for all the people who want to get back in shape. You know, kind of like ‘follow the fat guy to the starting line.’”


If memory serves, some of the other mock suggestions included calling me the Apple-Pied Piper and Deep Fried Piper. Family, eh?
In four months’ time, some 48,000-plus will line up for Canada’s largest 10K in downtown Vancouver. This scribe’s goal before then is to shed enough weight and log enough kilometres so that fitting into the PNG Pacers team uniform and completing the scenic race with my new ‘dashing sole mates’ will be a piece of cake. (Calorie-reduced, of course.)


Motivated to start training — and start hoarding fancy running gear — I did

some serious research after a couple Christmas drinks (hello, Google) about training for a 10K and was a bit bummed. Seems that the sexy and cool categories such as Cheetahs, Jaguars, Gazelles, Panthers, Hares and Road Runners are for the people who not only look like runners, but move swiftly and graciously, some even without sweating or heavy breathing.


The options for my pavement-denting category? Street Slugs, Grey-Hounds or Clydesdales, take your freakin’ pick.


There was also tons of online stuff about injuries and common reasons for them, like making resolutions to run 10Ks. There are motivational posters (Know your limitations and then defy them), interesting jargon (Fartlek training?) and witty humour (Hey baby, your PACE or mine?).
There are many colourful styles of footwear and sleek fashion clothing that will make you look professional, slimmer, stay drier and warmer.

Unfortunately, none of the stuff runs by itself so figuring out what works best will take extra time for this junk-food jogger.


And speaking of time, there are electronic toys and Apps aplenty that will chart your every move, calorie and pace.


There are also many myths and excuses discouraging running — you’ll throw your back out of whack, you’ll drool like Rocky, crave steroids and do irreparable damage to your legs and feet. But the upside is running is cheaper than therapy, sweat is fat crying, your couch will last longer and shouting “let’s kick some asphalt” just seems like a lot of fun.


Three of my sporty (and less carbo-loaded) Sun colleagues — Scott Neufeld, Katya Holloway and the boss Harold Munro — are also part of the Guinea Pig Program, and we’ll be trying to show the running TV stars at Global — Kaitlyn Herbst and Sonia Beeksma — how it’s done, one step (and a bit of teasing, trash talking) at a time.


In the new year we’ll be blogging about training tips and routines, the proficient people who will prepare us for the April 27 road test, some ideal diet plans, the fun runs in your community, the groups who benefit from this exciting event and the doughnut shops and drive-thrus suffering financially in my neighbourhood.


We hope you’ll follow the blogs and columns, but more importantly we hope you either run in the event or come out to support the thousands who do. If nothing else, it’s an interesting morning of people watching.


And don’t worry about finishing last. My supportive relatives can think of at least one gravy-loving Clydesdale who has that spot wrapped up like pigs in a blanket. Family, eh?
FOOT NOTES: Also on the Guinea Pig Program are Chris Catliff, the president and CEO of BlueShore Financial, Bronwen Thompson of BlueShore Financial and reporter Kelly Sinoski of The Vancouver Sun.

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